Serbian Men: The View Of An American Woman

An American girl from California married to a Serb writes a blog post about Serbian men. Here’s a short excerpt, but it’s worth reading the whole thing. It’s well written, and funny. That said, there are so many things wrong with this that I’m struggling to decide which to list first… so I will let Serbian women to post comments, and to tell the truth about Serbian men. Well, the short excerpt is here:

If I could describe the typical male Serb (born and raised in Serbia), I think he’d be something like this:

His name is probably Marko, Milan, Milos, Ivan, Jovan, Rade, Stefan, or Aleksandar. His last name end in “ic”. He owns an espresso maker and uses it daily. He is probably good-looking, semi-athletic, has good personal hygiene, and likes designer labels. Some people might wonder if he is gay, but he is not, (Serbia tends to be very anti-gay), he is actually just a metro sexual European. He probably likes to watch soccer and basketball on TV, but likes to play tennis in real life. He crosses his legs like a woman. He will communicate bluntly, to the point of being rude and offensive but try not to take it personally, this is just the Serbian way. With every meal, he must have bread, regardless of how many carbs are already present. He will eat a lot of rich foods, but maintain a fit body. He will probably be a liberal. He will be accustomed to strong liquor shots, and will like to toast before, during, and after, a meal. (Americans – don’t forget that European etiquette requires making eye contact and clinking glasses with everyone separately while toasting) He will kiss others (both men and women) on the cheeks daily and think nothing of it. He will probably be a chauvinist, but don’t fret, he is curable. He likes a girl who wears high heels, but doesn’t ever complain that her feet hurt. He wants her to cook for him just like his Mama…

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Karl Haudbourg

About Karl Haudbourg

I'm a Frenchman promoting Serbia in the world. I see myself as a Serb. Call me crazy. Call me insane. I am a pragmatic patriot. I love my country, Serbia.

24 Comments

  1. Zdravo!
    Hi all! I'm the one who posted this on my blog, and thanks for sending hits my way! As you can probably tell, this post is meant to be funny and lighthearted, but also a little insightful. These perceptions are based on the many Serbian men that I am associated with here in Los Angeles, and also based on my own experiences with my husband (Slobodan – born and raised in Belgrade and immigrated to LA at age 26). Of course, stereotyping, like I did, is just that – a stereotype, and in no way covers the multitude of personality types and wide variety of complex character types that are present in Serbian society. And of course, as a little pre-emptive explanation, I should say that if someone were to write a stereotype of a typical American woman, I would DEFINITELY NOT fit that mold, and I'm sure there are thousands of Serbian guys that would say they don't fit the mold I presented as well. Thanks for reading and I look forward to feedback! :)
    Cao!

    • Really a great post. I liked it so much. I know that you are close to the reality. It is just difficult to admit it is true:)

      • I am a Serbian male and found the post not only funny but mostly true. Nothing offensive at all. The young woman did not say that we are ugly, lazy, dirty, disrespectful, intentionally rude, stupid, untrustworthy, etc. I am OK with the description. In fact proud of the trait. As for cooking for him like his mama… ; the young lady misunderstands. We Serbs think that women should not be required or asked to do certain things because we as gentlemen would never allow it. This would include: changing a flat tire on a car, repairing the plumbing in the toilet, replacing a broken window, etc.. So while we are doing the less desirable jobs we appreciate it when dinner is ready and waiting when these dirty tasks are completed. We all have our skill sets and apply them accordingly. Why ask Michael Schumacher to play basketball or Vlade Divac to drive Formula 1. Cooperation and teamwork means helping where we are most capable. Just my Serbian theory.

        • You described it beautifully. I must appreciate that. I have been working with a Serb colleague. I found him very positive and friendly.

    • This is hilarious! I just started dating a Serbian guy and everything you said on this blog matches with my friend 100%. You forgot to mention that a Serbian man may shave his legs, but don’t mistake this him for being a homosexual! When I met his friend I came to the conclusion that Serbian men are extremely HOT!!! I’m just curious. How did you get this guy to marry you? I think I’m falling for him. He is the greatest gentleman I ever met. He opens doors for me and when we eat out, he’ll wait for me to take the first bite before he eats. I never carry my own bags and he’s so sweetly affectionate. I really like him. The only thing is that he’s way younger than me and I’m worried that he may want to sow his wild oats before settling down. So, I’m ending the relationship. We’ve dated only a month and since I’m a christian women I don’t want to fornicate. I may lose him forever. :(

    • Hello,

      I have been dating a Serbian guy for over a month now and he is the sweetest man I have been with to date. He is so intellligent and handsome, manly, yet he takes very good care of his looks (he spends about the same amount of time on his hair then I do lol!).

      At first I was nervous because westernised men play games (not all but in my short dating life I am 26) and they pretned to be as protective and caring but after a while it falls away. This guy seems so genuine, and LOVES it when I cook. In North america when u do cute, girly things for your boyfriend they feel you’re taking things to seriously and you’re labeled as crazy, but with my guy, he loves when I cook and act like a woman!

      He hadn’t had a hoem cooked meal for like a year when we met so I think it helped seal the deal. LOL

      He is so traditional compared to men in Canada (where I’m from ) and I’m so happy he’s the first guy I’ve ever dated who came to Church with me. (I am a christian)Not because I asked, I mentioned I was going and he invited himeself (I loved it!)

      He is so tall and handsome, I am falling so hard for him!!!

      Thanks for the insight and I can say I love the description above!!! I think any girl would be so blessed to date a man from such a wonderful culture!

    • This is hilarious!!!!! I am a California women born and raised in Los Angeles. I am engaged to a Serb and this pretty much describes him too. I read it out loud to him and we were both laughing out loud!!!!!

  2. Almost a bulls-eye, fantastic observation! I am 47, most of my life abroad, married to a Dutch girl – and we both agree that your "stereotyping" is sooooo true. Well done Juliet!

    And cheers to Karl for posting this!

    Dejan

  3. Pretty much true, at least for the younger generation of Serbian men!

  4. Lol…Good job! Mostly true… :-)

  5. We are probably one of the last lot of men not to be endoctrinated into the Western system which I just can't stand even after living in the West 60% of my life. But so true and as a Serb mate I am proud to be and die this way. A good all-in-one description.

  6. Sandra Krasojevic

    All in all, most of this is pretty true. My husband is Serbian but moved to New Zealand at 14 and now resides in the USA with me. He can eat anything he wants and remains athletic (so not fair) and he can’t cook for himself to save his life but he is the best man I have ever met and I am proud to have him as my husband. He is warm, protective and a very funny guy. Cheers!

  7. Woahh…. i can’t stand to say YES and smile as you described serbian man very true. I have date serbian man and often telling him that why he is sooo gay.. Ha ha ha , so finally find out that serbian man just like that. With Athletic outfit and love skincare products. But he is nice & faithful bf . I need to learn more about serbian and their country because i’m in love with him :-)

  8. Very true lol. I actually forwarded to some friends and they were like that is so you, who knew….

  9. I am engaged to a Serbian man, known him for 3 years now visited Belgrade and loved it. I love the passion of Serbian people their honesty and way of life, and the food is just AMAZING!

    I am originally from Africa ( Ethiopia) him and I met in LA at a going away event for a close friend of mine he worked with. It was something like love at first sight truthfully unbelievable connection. We were passionate and couldn’t keep hands off of each other. It was wild romantic and settled when needs be . He was and still is so caring loving and romantic he proposed in Serbia last year and I said yes :)

    Still as we plan for our future marriage and building a family the temper side of his personality is highly bothersome to me. I come from a family and a culture which values proper communication less curse words and much less tempered. We are not tempered by nature rather we are a very quiet and calm society. For him hitting tables cursing and occasionally hitting bags if the bag is in his way when he is mad is normal and part of his culture …. I have many Serbian friends that do not react as he does and wish for a change ….

    I wonder if that is possible at all – I love him dearly and do not want to change him at all nor his culture as I love the Serbian culture it is the root of what made me fall in love with him. The pride for the country the honesty and love of family the masculinity as we both play the role that we ought to play in our relationship every thing works fantastically EXCEPT that temper…

    With time I hope that this will change. But if any one has potential advice feel free to share

    Hvala

  10. This is a wonderful description. A little stereotyping now and then doesn’t hurt anything. It’s honest and interesting. I am married to a Serbian lady, and her passion and zest and vision can be both appealing and challenging. It’s a fascinating part of the world. It’s like they took some great cultural bits from Turkey and Italy and Germany and Russia and – poof – created a very cool place. Go Serbia!

  11. I’ve met a Serbian man (38yrs old)…I am 43yrs old. We met a friend’s gathering. I was attracted to him the moment I walked through the door….and when we started to speak, I found his knowledge, experience and zest for life unbelievably attractive. He is pretty darn close to what has been posted by Alpha Juliet. It’s been a month and things have moved quickly…I have been a single mom for 13yrs and did little dating over those years (by my choice) only to focus on raising my two small children. They are 18 and 16 now and I have a little more “ME” time. I’m born and raised in southwestern Ontario Canada. Stevan (Stefan) is a wonderful man…very strong (emotionally, physically and verbally)…I too am a strong woman and he respects my opinion at times when we may disagree. His European traditions are beautiful…except very different from our Canadian ones (times of the day when you have your meals) as well as the soup at “lunch” (our supper) and bread at every meal…I enjoy cooking as does he so we’ve shared those times…my worries are the speed at which this relationship is moving. Im a little more laid back and maybe take time learning about eachother…Stefan seems to know what he wants and goes straight for it…I’m not complaining…just wondering if their personalities would be open to a light discussion where I could share my thoughts without offending a great guy.

    thanks

  12. I met a Serbian guy as well. I am 33 and he is 40, awesome guy. Like a previous post by Suzanne, I am surprised at the speed of the relationship. I met him twice, we talked about our point of views etc and he said if everything goes well we live together soon then in 6 months I get the ring, omg… To me it is kind of fast. I DO care about him, he is a gentleman and I like him a lot, my question is: is it normal at all to go that fast? He said he knows what he wants and doesn’t like to waste his time.

  13. I was onced into a relationship with a serbian guy, alpha juliet description was indeed true. Personal hygiene are extremely important and is very protective. That is One reason why I fell in love with my ex Bf and even until now.

    But what clashes our relationship , he tends to be so controlling with a zealous type of personality and paranoid that I decided to let go of him so that he can move on and to find someone who can make him happy rather to be with me and make his life more miserable.

    this serbian guy for me is my dream man.. He is just perfect to be with but sad it didnt work.

  14. I have known my Serbian partner for around 8 years , and we were in a relationship for 6 of those years, still see each other often , only because cannot seem to shake him off, however i think of him as a good mate. Allot of comments i have read i would agree with, he is very vain, esp regarding how others perceive him, loves any item of clothing with a label, even if it looks stupid. As a people i find them slightly aggressive and abrasive in their manner of dealing with people. I went to Serbia many time over the years , and would agree that they are a very very handsome people, tall and naturally athletic. However they have allot of bad qualities , very xenophobic especially against jews, gypsies and “bosniaks” (muslims) and homophobic , which always made me feel uncomfortable being an openly gay third generation british pakistani of muslim heritage . However they have far more good qualities than bad, Most of my family adore him, esp my mum , because he has allot of natural charm, always taking time to talk and take an interest with my family, which was important to me.. Also i found that if they have a strong masculine personality , you can lose yourself, They don’t have the same concepts as we do in the west, where relationship should be based on equals , They like the roles you would have in a straight relationship and try to impose them, however they are very easy to understand, and do not play games in relationships. I would highly recommend a date at the very least if you meet a Serb… but start as you mean to go on, and deal with thing as they arise. however a would of warning , their love can seem as possessive and some would say verging on obsessive … just always trust your own intuition

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